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Stupid Dirty

Stupid Dirty - Erin Russell

Stupid Dirty

CADE I always thought of Silas Rush as my biggest rival on the track and a stuck-up loner off it. But he and his fancy pro career left our crappy hometown in the dust before high school even finished, and then I didn't think of him much at all. I was too busy trying to keep my little sisters from turning into addicts like our mom, and myself from turning into a rage-junkie like our dad. All while keeping food on the table. Now he's back, reminding me of all the things I don't have, just like he always did. Except now we're both adults. And when I... y'know... talk to the guy for once, it looks like my teenage self might have been too distracted to see all the things that Silas didn't have as well. After catching him at his lowest possible moment, my heart goes out to the guy I used to hate. All my anger turns to guilt, and instead of a rival, I somehow end up with a socially-awkward new best friend that's just as screwed-up as I am. Which I can handle. I can admit when I'm wrong. As long as things between us don't get any more complicated or confusing, I can handle it. SILAS I have a very camera-ready smile. Dad always told me if I wanted to make my pro motocross career stick, I needed to get over all the awkwardness and anxiety that ruined high school for me and learn to act like a real boy for the public. Never mind that I didn't want to be a pro rider, or smile for the camera, or live life with Dad on the road and never know what it's like to have a real friend or - gasp - relationship. Years and years of motocross training, publicity training, and all-the-rest-of-it training; I still don't have a life and one stupid mistake has left my precious career in the toilet. The last person I expect to pull me out of this hole is Cade Waters. I'm pretty sure everyone hated me in high school, but Cade was front and center. Which sucked, because with everyone else, he was sunshine personified. I was always the only person who sparked that anger in him, and I never even knew how I did it. So, when Cade not only swoops in to help me in my darkest moment, but decides to abandon our childhood rivalry and adopt me as his newest bestie/pity project, I'm not sure how to take it. What I do know is that after a lifetime of having nothing I really wanted, all it takes is one glimpse of Cade's life to get me hooked. He's a mess, sure, just like I am. But all that sunshine... I want to grab onto it with both hands and never let go. No matter how confusing that feeling may be
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CADE I always thought of Silas Rush as my biggest rival on the track and a stuck-up loner off it. But he and his fancy pro career left our crappy hometown in the dust before high school even finished, and then I didn't think of him much at all. I was too busy trying to keep my little sisters from turning into addicts like our mom, and myself from turning into a rage-junkie like our dad. All while keeping food on the table. Now he's back, reminding me of all the things I don't have, just like he always did. Except now we're both adults. And when I... y'know... talk to the guy for once, it looks like my teenage self might have been too distracted to see all the things that Silas didn't have as well. After catching him at his lowest possible moment, my heart goes out to the guy I used to hate. All my anger turns to guilt, and instead of a rival, I somehow end up with a socially-awkward new best friend that's just as screwed-up as I am. Which I can handle. I can admit when I'm wrong. As long as things between us don't get any more complicated or confusing, I can handle it. SILAS I have a very camera-ready smile. Dad always told me if I wanted to make my pro motocross career stick, I needed to get over all the awkwardness and anxiety that ruined high school for me and learn to act like a real boy for the public. Never mind that I didn't want to be a pro rider, or smile for the camera, or live life with Dad on the road and never know what it's like to have a real friend or - gasp - relationship. Years and years of motocross training, publicity training, and all-the-rest-of-it training; I still don't have a life and one stupid mistake has left my precious career in the toilet. The last person I expect to pull me out of this hole is Cade Waters. I'm pretty sure everyone hated me in high school, but Cade was front and center. Which sucked, because with everyone else, he was sunshine personified. I was always the only person who sparked that anger in him, and I never even knew how I did it. So, when Cade not only swoops in to help me in my darkest moment, but decides to abandon our childhood rivalry and adopt me as his newest bestie/pity project, I'm not sure how to take it. What I do know is that after a lifetime of having nothing I really wanted, all it takes is one glimpse of Cade's life to get me hooked. He's a mess, sure, just like I am. But all that sunshine... I want to grab onto it with both hands and never let go. No matter how confusing that feeling may be
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